lynsangelic1: (Other: Apply fanfic?)

This is the author auction I mentioned a few days ago.

This is why - from
Like millions of Americans Stacie ([ profile] truelovepooh ) was unable to afford expensive health insurance premiums and kept her fingers crossed that she wouldn’t require medical treatment. A 34 year old wife and mother of three had no reason to think her health would be an issue - she was young and had no previous health concerns.
Her life changed on March 26th 2007 when she was diagnosed with both stage 2 ovarian cancer and breast cancer.
Pooh was forced to give up her job and has faced numerous visits to see doctors and specialists at the Trover Medical Foundation where she is being treated. Unfortunately, because she did not have insurance the medical bills are mounting and whilst the hospital are being very understanding and providing limited financial assistance the expenses are huge.
Many of you who read this blog will know “Pooh” - she will have touched your lives with her kindness, warmth and generosity - someone you can count on and who always puts others before herself. Also, many of you who read this blog may not know Stacie. You may have been directed here by friends or by following a link from one of the sites that are supporting our fundraising drive. Please take a moment to read this blog and find out what you can do to help a wonderful person in her battle with cancer.

Stacie is going to need constant treatment over the coming months and she needs our help to fight this disease. We are starting a fundraising drive to help support Stacie and her family.

is what we're doing - from

A Fanfic-On-Demand fundraiser is underway for friends of Stacie. Authors in any fandom are invited to write a short fic on demand. The writing challenges will be delivered to each participating author by the highest bidder in their personal auction, which will run September 8-14, 2008 here at

The highest bidder gets to deliver the fic challenge to the author they’ve “won,” along with the story’s pairing, the rating, and other pertinent details (within reason and within the author’s stated fandom and limitations - i.e., some authors prefer not to write smut or a certain pairing). The author will be given up to 30 days to finish the fic, beginning with the day that payment is received.

What I'm doing

I've got 3 auctions going on - a 2,500+ word Harry Potter femslash, a 2,500+ word Grey's Anatomy femslash and a sneak preview of chapter nine of the This Is A Problem series which will be 5,000+ words. You get to set me to work. You say Hooch/Giant Squid, I'll be writing it. [As long as the Qiant Squid is female - cause, y'know, femmeslash only ;) ] You want raunchy mop cupboard sex, you got it. You want a heartbreaking unrequited Katie Bell/Professor Sinistra love story, it's all yours. Just put up the cash ;)

I'm trying to find the words to explain why I'm taking part, but I feel it's quite obvious.

[ profile] truelovepooh is a fantastic, caring, kind hearted person battling not only cancer, but an obscene medical financial system. She needs more treatment but the hospital won't allow anymore until "unless a substantial payment is made".

We all love our fandom community, especially here on LJ. Friendships can be forged over oceans and 'ships and in the strangest of ways. As fandom, we can band together to participate in something we can not only enjoy, but show amazing compassion and support for one of our own.


The Need-To-Know links

A summary of all the authors and fandoms available in alphabetical order

Main Board: All authors bid threads are housed here

My $5 Harry Potter fic auction - F/slash, 2,500

My $5 Grey’s Anatomy fic auction - F/slash, 2,500

$10 Grey’s Anatomy This Is A Problem series Chapter 9 advance sneak preview auction - At least 5,000

Information on bidding

[And I may not technically be writing a VM fic for auction, but I could not resist my KBell...]

Grab a banner from here. Put it on your f-list! Annoy people to death about the auction! Because it is important. And not for my ego - there are 57 authors in this auction from a cross-section of fandoms so I'm willing to bet there's something for everyone. So - pimp, pimp, pimp.

And please bid. Haven't we all wanted a little writer puppet at one time or another? A wicked little writer puppet to do with as you please...
lynsangelic1: (Other:Why Songfic?)

: Hr/G (background)

Characters: Harry, Hermione, Ginny

Rating: PG-13

Summary: What happens when the internet comes to Hogwarts?

Disclaimer: Blah as always.

Authors Notes: Crack fic to the extreme.  Time period is irrelevant.  And it’s so terribly post-post-post modern ;)  Written between the hours of 2.10am and 4.30am.  That should be warning enough for the “humour” contained within.



lynsangelic1: (Default)

Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test...

NBPC - The Daydreamer


You perceive the world with particular attention to nature. You focus on the hidden treasures of life (the background) and how that fits into the larger picture. You are also particularly drawn towards the colors around you. Because of the value you place on nature, you tend to find comfort in more subdued settings and find energy in solitude. You like to ponder ideas and imagine the many possibilities of your life without worrying about the details or specifics. You are in tune with all that is around you and understand your life as part of a larger whole. You are a down-to-earth person who enjoys going with the flow.

The Perception Personality Types:


Take The Perception Personality Image Test at HelloQuizzy

Daydreamer? So not surprised. It's quite accurate in regards to comfort and energy in solitude, especially by the sea.  Give me a sea and a nice sky and I'm happy. It's actually what I plan to do for my birthday this year - sit by the sea for the day, notepad, music, Irn Bru and I'll be set. I usually get melancholy to the extreme on my birthday - not so much about getting older, but other things.  I've tried many different things over the past few years to combat the birthday blues - quiet family dinner, raucous night out, quiet night out, raucous night in etc etc but I'm feeling quite good about this plan and haven't actually told anyone yet, although I'm sure it'll be considered extremely sad. I just hope the weather's decent. As much as I like the rain, I don't fancy hanging out in the rain by the sea by myself.

The quiz is wrong in terms of 'going with the flow' and not paying attention to detail, but even a computer can't be right all the time.  I see I missed the 'artist' criteria only by favouring background over foreground.  That's just because I have a thing for seas and skies :)

I wrote a crack!fic in the wee hours of last night. It's not anything special, but I'll post it later. I see that 12,000 HP fans have petitioned to have the film moved back to November. I'd sign that on condition that the movie would indeed be finished to best of ability by November and that the move was entirely motivated by money (which is ridiculous because HBP is making millions and millions any time).  However, if they want an extra couple months to edit, polish, tweak or maybe even reshoot some scenes then I'm cool with a Summer 09 release.  As much as I have been looking forward to HBP, I don't want it to be an utter pile of crap when it comes out because IMO Yates needs every advantage he can get to compensate for his poor skills in this genre.

On other news, I have completely OD'd on football since the season's return.  I even watched a game between Miami FC and the Carolina RailHawks in the USL first division at some stupid time in the morning over the internet on the Fox soccer channel.  I'm telling you - I'm seriously ill.
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lynsangelic1: (HP:Masturbate JKR kills)

My Top 5 (tagged by [profile] zee014 - Who else would give me such a task?)

1) List 5 celebrities you would consider having sex with without even asking questions (provided they smelled good).
2) Put all of them IN ORDER of your lust for them [5 - 1, 1 is the hottest].
3) Say which movie/show/thing it was that hooked you.
4) Supply photos for said people.
5) Tag five people


5 – Elizabeth Perkins

Lovely.  Just lovely.  Her hair's quite strawberry blonde here, but often quite red.  As Celia Hodes, she is one of the hottest women ever to say 'fuck'.  Weeds would be the thing that turned me onto her.  But I do remember thinking she was very beautiful as a child watching Miracle on
34th Street.


4 – Jennifer Garner


Though this is an undeniably racy picture, the reason I like Garner is that she’s so naturally beautiful and wholesome, especially when smiling.  She’s got that strong jaw, sun kissed skin thing that I like.  Many people may not think that a ‘thing’ but it is to me.  Alias would be the show that introduced me to JG.

3 – Kristen Bell


My obsession with KB has been well-documented in this journal.  She’s just so classy, beautiful and smart.  I first saw her in Veronica Mars, squealed like a little bitch when she turned up in Heroes as I hadn’t read any spoilers for her casting but it was my dream that spurred on the love.

2 – Kate Winslet


First adored in Titanic, then in Jude and Heavenly Creatures.  My love grew as she acted her socks off in the terrific Quills and was cemented truly in Eternal Sunshine’s crotch showing scene in the 70’s dress with red hair.  Myself and another pervy little friend clutched each other and squealed in the cinema as this moment.  Were we embarrassed?  No, not a bit!

1 – Angelina Jolie


First, last and probably always.  I think Jolie splits opinions but she is undeniably beautiful, even if she isn’t your cup of tea.  Loved her in Tomb Raider – a friend of mine buying her and me matching Lara Croft posters from the local video shop – and tracked her back catalogue to Gia and this is where the love bloomed.  I’ve seen most of what she’s done – both good and bad – but she remains immensely talented.  She’s talented and fierce yet sometimes appearing vulnerable and gentle.  Plus, the lips aren’t exactly a turn off either.

Honourable Mentions to: Catherine Zeta Jones (Huge Chicago era crush), Sandra Bullock (because I rewatched Speed the other day), Winona Ryder (Because I like the way she talks. And steals) Christina Ricci (I even fancied her in Casper – but it’s not wrong as I’m younger), Kate Walsh (who would be in the top 5, were it not for the true guffity of Private Practice), Natalie Portman (whose clear talent makes me hot and bothered), Claire Danes (Sooo pretty), Eliza Dushku (I’m sure I would struggle to walk afterwards), Jennifer Beals (Just because), Leighton Meester (Also, just because), Megan Mullally, Cate Blanchett, Emily Blunt and many, many more.


Really.  It would’ve been easier to make a top 100.

And now other stuff.  Well I’ve been watching a couple of movies lately.  I do go through phases where I’ll have the patience and/or time to sit down and enjoy a film and then I’ll watch loads.  Then I’ll watch nothing for months.  It cycles.


Seen Dark Knight.  As many, many others have.  Very enjoyable, well written, well acted and I’d say that I liked it better than Batman Begins.  However, this craziness over at IMDB which ranks it number one of all time - above Shawshank Redemption and Gia - is just nonsense.   I have full faith that the balance to the universe will be restored in a few months once everyone’s shit has calmed down.


Rewatchings of Casino and Speed followed, both being enjoyed thoroughly.  Casino remains my favourite Scorcese movie – an opinion which is often scoffed at.  I care not.


Then watched Poseidon tonight (I was in the mood for sinking ship stuff after the Doctor Who similar type Xmas special.)  I’m a fan of disaster films – good trash to get swept up in, I say.  I’m also funnily enough, a fan of Kurt Russell (Maybe because I fancy both his partner and daughter).  I’ve grown accustomed to his face.  Poseidon got me thinking about what I would do in such a situation (as most disaster films do).  I was getting immensely pissed off at Mia Maestro’s whiny character - so much so that I had to express my opinion to the screen with a series of grunts and then later shrieking ‘OH MY GOD YOU GIT, JUST GET ON WITH IT! IT’S NOT THAT DIFFICULT IF YOU WANT TO LIVE!  YOUR IDIOCY IS GOING TO GET EVERYONE KILLED!’


Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that if I was ever in a disaster situation, I would vet my crew or accompanying party while I make a break for safety.


Claustrophobic?  Panic attacks?  Then no, sorry, stay here and die with the others. I can’t have you spazzing out at possibly the worst moment


Drunk?  No, no.  It’s best you stay here and enjoy your last moments as you will surely make some hideous inebriated mistake and die horribly.  But not before acting like a jackass and causing discord in the group.


Weak/injured but too noble for own good?  Sorry.  I’ll just get attached to you and then you’ll die to either save the rest of us or because you were too slow or pathetic.


Child?  No.  Just NO.  I realise that in Poisedon they needed they little moron to get past one challenge, but really, who the hell wanders off while on a sinking ship?  You get bored with all the imminent danger and death? Idiot.


Kurt Russell?  Yeah.  OK.  You’ve got me there.  I do want you on my team.  While others would pick Willis, Stallone or even Van Damme: I’m sticking with Russell.

I imagine there are probably more criteria.

And a final word on the new Half Blood Prince trailer - Voldemort Begins, or what?  Barely saw any Hermione.  Humph.  But the mini-Voldemort kid looks ace.  The pensieve vials look... highly suggestive.  It's estimated that slash writers have produced 176% more fanfic since the release of this trailer.

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lynsangelic1: (BtVS:Fuffy knife enemies)

HP edition.


1. The first character I fell in love with

Hermione Granger.

2. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now

Ginny Weasley.  Because, y’know, in the first book she was this barely-there, starstruck little wean.  Ginny or Bellatrix.  I think before I really got to know Bella, I was in the ‘OMG, but she’s so evil!!!11’ camp.  Then I got to know and love her and now I’m in the ‘Yes.  She’s evil.  She’s deliciously, fanatically evil’ place.

3. The character everyone else loves that I don't

James or Sirius.  Sometimes I’m so incredibly annoyed by them that I can’t sit still while reading.

4. The character I love that everyone else hates

It’s really hard to gauge the hate of a character in a fandom this big. I'm sure plenty of fangirls hate Bella because she - OMG killed Sirius! So, we'll go for Bella.

5. The character I used to love but don't any longer

Merope Gaunt.  No.  Kidding.  I don’t think there’s any in the HP fandom that I’ve swung that dramatically on.

6. The character I would shag anytime

Lily.  Or Hermione.  Or Ginny.  Or Bella.  Or any of the Black sisters.

7. The character I'd want to be like

*straight face*  Filch.

8. The character I'd slap

Filch, in a kinky way.  James Potter.

9. A pairing that I love

Filch/mops. Hermione/Ginny.

10. A pairing that I despise

mops/brooms.  Ron/Hermione - come on, you saw that coming, didn’t you?  Failing that – Lily/James.  I’m really don’t understand the school-bully-turned-nice-guy thing and Lily shouldn’t have forgotten the past so easily.  James was a horrid little twerp.



BtVS/AtS edition


1.  The first character I fell in love with

In innocent love – S1-2 Buffy Summers.  In lusty, dirty, filthy love? Faith.

2. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now

Anya and Fred.

3. The character everyone else loves that I don't

Andrew.  Fuck fuck fuck Andrew.  Yes, three fucks are necessary.  I hate that little git.

4. The character I love that everyone else hates

Hm, this is difficult.  Would Darla or Lilah be particulary hated?  I don’t think they are.  Glory? 

5. The character I used to love but don't any longer

Spike.  Loved Spike in s2 and his dynamic with Dru and thought he was cleverly written into season 4.  I can still enjoy a witty line from Spike during 6&7 but as soon as he starts with the ‘Oh, Buffy, I love you so much that I’d kid on getting my own soul back even though I was clearly looking for the chip because there is no way I’d be idiotic enough to want a soul back, especially seeing what it did to Angelus but somehow I ended up with this soul and blah blah blah’ crap I scream at the TV.

6. The character I would shag anytime

Faith.  Darla.  Glory.  At the same time.  Now that’s crazy!sex.  Add Dru and it’s fully-fledged insane.

7. The character I'd want to be like

*straight face*  D’Hoffyrn.

8. The character I'd slap

Connor.  Andrew.

9. A pairing that I love

Buffy/Faith.  Willow/Tara.  Buffy/Angel (Yes, I am a nostalgic sap.)

10. A pairing that I despise


Edit: because of format fuckage.  Is anyone else experiencing the same difficulties or is it just me?  It happened last night as well.  I believe it must be firefox3's fault but just checking in case it's an LJ thing.

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lynsangelic1: (HP:Hermione Blokes God you're stupid)

Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches

Author: [personal profile] lynsangelic1

Pairing: Hr/G, Hr/R

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Remember that book from Deathly Hallows?  The book that helped Ron Weasley improve his skills with the ladies?  Yeah.  That book.

Disclaimer: Blah.

Authors Notes: This didn’t really start as a fic.  It was an anti-Hr/R ship manifesto disguised as a fic but adding Hr/G usually spurs me to write more than necessary so it grew a little beyond the original intention.  Kinda silly turned to kinda fluffy.  It has no place in actual canon. 

I decided to write this after [personal profile] lash_larue threatened to write Hr/R smuttiness in retaliation to my usual angst.  I’m quickly learning that Lash does not threaten – she executes.  So this is for you, Lash.



lynsangelic1: (BtVS:Willow/Tara Seeing Red)
Can any of my Potter-inclined f-list tell me roughly when/which month the first Hogsmeade weekend usually takes place? I was thinking November?  Maybe October?  I vaguely recall Hallowe'en in Hogsmeade but there is every chance that was a fic and not, in fact, canon.

Also, did anyone greet this news with a bit of a shudder and stern shake of the head?  Just me then?  A HP prequel... When I read this I thought it would be Marauders era and I punched the air, as that's what comes to mind when prequel is mentioned.  But it's Harry-living-under-the-stairs era.  Glorious. (/sarcasm) It took me several tries to get through the first part of Philosopher's Stone with 'La la la Harry under the stairs with spiders, it's such a sad situation that you must feel for him instantly and bond and blah blah blah.'

Anyway, I don't think it be as twee or kid-aimed as the first bit of P.S but all the images in my head are of abuse!fic.  The Child Called It-Potter style.  I don't know why, but it's all I can think of.  I'm sure it'll be Harry's first bit of magic as a child or whatever because at 800 words how much can you really fit in?

EDIT:  I is dramatically wrong.  Huzzah! [info]carawj pointed me towards this article and it's set three years before Harry's born and concerns James and Sirius.  Muchos thankos.

Spent the morning with the puppy and the hose.  Bad idea.  Now soaking.

Scotland are kicking off a meaningless friendly with half a squad of players in 45 minutes (4.30 on a Friday is such a bizarre time for a friendly).  I feel that we may get gubbed.  I don't particularly want to watch right now because I'm busy writing (hence the Potter related research) but I will.  It is Scotland, after all.

Oh, and does anyone want to read Image of You in Russian?  Soon coming in German.  Shame I can't speak/read a word of either but still quite cool.
lynsangelic1: (Snape not killed by draperies)
I am quite remarkably calm tonight. For the moment.  Posted another IOY while listening to the strangest of the strange in my music collection.  One minute it's grrl rock, the next 60's compliations, the next classical.  If I start to go any further back in time I'll be listening to two guys banging rocks together.

And the rest is silence.

Actually.  I lied.  I am a bit angry.  Watched the clip of the Oklahoma representative, Sally Kern this afternoon, not long after reading more about the Scottish bishop
Joseph Devine.  One is informing us that the homosexual lifestyle is being indoctrinated into children as young as 2 (I thought that pre-school education in the US started later than that - are the gays passing out flyers at play parks?) , the other warning of of huge and well orchestrated conspiracy created by the gays to attack Christian Values. (I know nothing about this which makes me a little huffy.  Was I too busy ordering my DVD's and missed the memo?  If we were planning a mass attack on Values then I should at least be heading one of the assault teams.)

Urgh.  I know I shouldn't get annoyed at these right wing bigots.  It's a pointless waste of time and perfectly good fury that could be directed towards nuclear arms, the new bloody Budget, whaling or David Yates.  But it exasperates me so thoroughly.  How people like that can still exist in the modern world.

We're not too bad in Britain on the political side.  We've had the 'difficult' debates on section 28, lowering the gay male consent age and the right to civil union.  It's not great but it could be worse.  And this is in comparison to the Religious Right of the the Republican party.  Abortion is never a campaign issue in General/Holyrood elections, yet it still remains a bit part of American politics.  That amazes me.

It amazes me that a small minority of people who are so stout in their bigoted, backward opinions seek public office to, in large part, impose their opinions on the country.  Many of whom according to polls, do not agree with them.  However, this section of society is largely quiet whereas the Neo-conservatives and the religious right are banging on my door, giving me magazines and once - stopped me on Elm Row to tell me how I could be saved.  Elm Row in Edinburgh is right in the heart of the pink triangle, so they positioned themselves nicely.

You know what sucked (going completely OT)?  All my time, living ten minutes down the road from JKR and never once did I see her.  Never once did she come round to mine for a cup of tea.  Never once did she show me the epilogue so I would have a chance to incinerate it before the rest of the world saw.  My old flatmate Callum saw her loads of times in Sainsbury's.  That little bitch never once spoke to her.  Idiot.  The most famous author in the world and he just went on his merry way.  He's not really a fan but used to love taking the piss out of me.  All the news I have is she wears clacky high heels and buys good, simple food as well as the 2 for 1 deals.  She's classy.

Hm.  The rage is gone.  Maybe because JKR soothed me by telling me that Dumbledore's gay, which, TBH, was quite obvious in book 7.  Nice to have the confirmation.  I wonder if she was at all influenced by slash in her decision?

So now I pull on my black balaclava and sheath my samurai sword to go and give the chance to those two bigoted fools to revise their opinions.  I will stand up for Dumbledore if no one else will.
lynsangelic1: (Minerva)

Miraculously I had a day off today to was able to go and see the staff screening with flatmate of Order of the Phoenix.  Still a bit confused at how I feel about it all...

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lynsangelic1: (Addy long hair)
I've seen some pics..  To quote my lovely Addy up there, it made me throw up in my mouth a little.

I knew they were coming. I have seen and read Equus- so called perk of being a drama student.  From the moment it was announced, I thought 'Daniel Radcliffes first stage role is as a psychologically damaged horse-fucker?!?' (To be fair, I think you'd be pushed to find a horse fucker who isn't psychologically damaged.)

Dan is not a classically great actor. He can remember lines and be fairly OK.  But give him something serious to do and he's no Bobby De Niro (though his gripping Ceds body in Goblet was nice).  

So here's my problem - how the hell is he pulling off this role when all the stagecraft he's learned for such a huge venue in London (so very different to camera acting) is in the school nativity?

I knew WB would pitch a fit.  They're probably thinking in hindsight they should have put in his contract A. No nakedness until series is done.  B.  No graphic sex until series is done.  And C.  No beastiality until series is done.

Hindsight's a bitch, eh WB?

It is creeping me out though.  This kid can't go and see graphic sex/violence i.e. Showgirls/Any Tarantino film in the cinema for another year but he can prance about bollock naked, shagging a representational horse head and cavorting with a naked chick?  

He can't even drink in the bar post-show ----  There's no point in theatre unless you get pissed apres-show.  It's just not the same.  You have to prance about, luvvy kissing with a beer or chardonnay in hand or the whole experience is awash.

Trust me Dan, I know.

Urgh *throws up in mouth again*

I'm dealing with this the only way I know how -- Shouting "Dan/Horse!" whenever I think of the photos of his arse/pubes.